My New Baby Brother From Efeeopia

It seems like one of the big issues with adoption is how to talk to your biological children about their new sibling. We don't really know if there is a proper way to do this, but we have chosen to be proactive in talking to Ellie and Ansley Mills about it.

Starting a couple of months ago, we started planting the idea with Ellie that she would soon have a new baby brother. We explained to her that she would get to be even more of a big sister than she is now and that she would have to help out a lot. She seemed to like this idea.

I think Ellie also likes the fact that he will be from far away. We got out a map some time ago to show her where Ethiopia was and tried to explain to her that it would be different than when Ansley Mills was born. We told her that he was probably not born yet, but that Leah and i would go pick him up once he was several months old.

All this has resulted in some funny situations with Ellie lately:

1.) Several times now Ellie has looked up to complete strangers in elevators or on the metro and said, "I am going to have a new baby brother and he is not born yet." These people smile at Ellie and then give a very non-pregnant looking Leah a weird glare like she is involved in some tawdry relationship where her children get new siblings without her being pregnant. She just smiles back.

2.) Every night when we are saying Ellie's prayers she prays very diligently for her Lambys, Tinker Bell, her Bo-Bo, her friends, her fruit bars, Cinderella, Mommy, Daddy and Ansley Mills and very last for "my new baby brother from Efeeopia." I think she saves the best for last.

3.) The other night around 9:30 (almost two hours after Ellie was put to bed), Leah and I were yelling something to each other up the stairwell about some paperwork we needed to send to Ethiopia. Out of nowhere, Ellie yells out, "What are ya'll talking about my brother for?" We died laughing and told her to go to bed.

Overall, this part of the adoption process seems to be going well. As you can see from the anecdotes above, Ellie is excited and talks about it all the time. However, we are worried because Ansley Mills has not said a word about it. All we get out of her is grunts and mumbles. She is obviously repressing some feelings...