Monday, August 3, 2009

These people take me to the edge...


Do you trust these faces?


Does this look like someone who negotiates?


After two hours of a temper tantrum and trashing their room, this one has found a quiet place to contemplate her actions.

I am inspired to write today, because it has been one of those days. Not entirely to the edge but there have been several days in the last two weeks that I found myself pulling together a current resume. I catch myself thinking, "dear God why did you give me these people to care for and love, I feel ill equip for this mega responsibility." I have days where I feel like super mom, sweet kids, they listen, they love others well, they love each other well and seem overall to be content and happy with themselves and the life around them. However, there are those days when I find myself wondering if someone else could raise them better. They have NO control over their emotions, reasoning, physical energy, volume, appetite, and other general laws of physics. Nothing seems to work! Did I really do it so different last week versus this week?

Now friends before you call child services or my parents. I just can not help but wonder how do you do this sometimes? I feel like a terrible mom, wife, friend, daughter and neighbor. And as quickly as they drive me crazy, they say hilarious stuff that makes me laugh out loud. I am humbled by them daily and pushed deeper into my belief in Christ because of them. I have learned how to love more selflessly (not always by choice...hehehe) and push myself to care beyond exhaustion. This past weekend we did our maiden camping voyage. Definitely, another post! While we were camping I found myself so enjoying time together without distractions. However, distractions are part of the process, and so you have to learn to function with them.

There are days I want a different life and days I could not want anything but this life. So how does this day end, or get better... it may not get better but it will end. When it ends I will peek in on these people while they are sleeping and remember why I love them so much and why I will do it all over again tomorrow.

5 comments:

mama becca said...

all i can say is...
"i get it!!!"
and lest you think anyone else does a better job than you... forget it. we are all in the same boat... especially with three (or more) so close in age. some lovely ladies are just a wee bit better at faking their "i have it all together" images than others. keep keepin' it real... you will bless many other mamas who also NEED your honesty!!!
lots of love...
becca

Jana & Jason Harwell said...

Good grief, friend...I said these same things to Jason just the other night, and we only have ONE. Of course, number 2 will be here in 2 weeks...

Most days I ask myself, "What in the world am I going to do with TWO CHILDREN?!" I can't even wrap my mind around 3.

Thanks for the honesty. Blessings to you...xoxo

Jana

Holls of Grigs said...

ha! i think you're perfect.

Emma Collie said...

AMEN. thanks for being vulnerable. it's the only way to really make it through. you'll have to call for my stories since i'm not so much the blogger.

that's all for now.

Unknown said...

Love it. I was thinking earlier today that we should get the kids to play together...in the street perhaps.